Apologies first of all. This post isn’t so much a blog post, but more a reminder to my future self.
Sometimes you just have to write things down to remind yourself. I’m not talking about a “must remember to buy carrots” reminder here, I’m talking about having an experience, or a realisation and writing it down so that your future self doesn’t make the same judgement call/assumption again.
The lesson I have to remember today is not to self sabotage. Not to presume that something happened for a reason that you can’t possibly know.
So this is my note to the future me.
Dear Future Me,
Stop being such a bloody idiot.
If a guy finds you attractive, if a guy calls you beautiful and you believe him (something I never ever do usually), then the reason why he broke things off is therefore NOT for the way you look.
Also, trying to be someone you aren’t just to stay in a relationship you already know isn’t going to work is also stupid. Trying to be someone else full stop is stupid. Insecurity isn't attractive.
Be yourself. Always be yourself. It will probably turn out that the person you actually are is what they actually saw in you in the first place.
The idiotic person who is still trying to work things out.