2025 - The Biggest Year of My Life

 2025 was a big one.  The biggest of my life.

My boyfriend and I started 2025 in a flurry of activity.  We had bought a house and were in the process of moving boxes from November 2024 until we finally moved in, in mid January 2025.  This was a big move for me.

I had moved in with my boyfriend two years prior, but his home did not feel like my home.  Anyone who has moved in with someone who previously lived with a long term partner can understand that.  Although I liked the house, it was not truly my home and I knew that I would never be at home there.

My boyfriend had restored that house from the ground up and had a lot of emotion tired to that house, but he knew that I would never be comfortable.  Finding a home perfect for both of us though was less of a challenge than I thought.  The right one appeared and by January, we were in. 

Although there is work to be done and changes to be made, I truly love this house.  It feels like home.  My home.  Our home.  This is the first house of my life that has truly felt like mine.  

So that was the first big change of the year.  The second was my job.  I had been thinking about a change of jobs for a few months, but having been at that job for 25+ years, even thinking about moving was a big thing.  I had truly grown up with that firm, having started there when I turned 18.  Some people still there when I left had seen me grow from a child to a woman and I had a relationship with my boss that I know will never be replicated.  

But the work had changed.  The firm had changed.  I was working and had been for some time in historical abuse and that was taking its toll.  Adding that to a change in ownership and a change in location and all the signs were telling me that it was time to go.

I was lucky enough to be headhunted in March by another firm.  Different department, different work, more pay and the people all seemed to be nice.  So, I made the decision and jumped ship.

My last day with the firm was emotional.  I shed tears when I walked out of the door for the last time but could only hope that I had made the right decision.

Starting at my new job was like starting my career over again.  Although the basis of what I did was the same, the work was completely new and I knew nothing about it.  I was starting to learn again, whilst being in a busy office and from the ground up.  But I found the challenge exhilarating and after the first couple of months of "Can I do this?" the answer was yes, yes I can.

I have been incredibly lucky to move to this new firm where I feel at home.  Where all the staff are fantastic, I made made a close friend in one of my colleagues and the money is better.  My old boss has checked on me a couple of times (I suspect to see if I wanted to come back) and I have bumped into him once.  I had a fantastic working relationship with him and that is something that I will never have again.  The rest of my old work colleagues have been disappointing.  I have not heard from any of them (yes I reached out).  But hey ho.  My life has moved on.

Finally, and most importantly, I have finally found my inner peace.  I have struggled for most of my adult life, but this was the year where I found the tools to put to rest my ghosts.  I reached the point where I could finally exhale.   I had the moment of knowing, right then and there, that everything is now ok.  I am ok.  It was wonderful.  More than wonderful.

Healing can be a long process and the journey can be full of dead ends, side paths and doubling back.  But since that day, I have felt a calm, a peace and happiness like I have never known.  I am now who I was always meant to be.  Unrestrained and unencumbered by pain.  

I have my boyfriend who I adore, a home I love, a job I enjoy, great friends and I have found my peace.  There are no more locked boxes hidden away, no dark corners in the attic of my mind.  There is light there now; and peace and happiness.

I am thankful.

Silly Things That Irritate

Have you ever had an absolute irritation of something that is completely irrational?  Something that has no effect on you or your life whatsoever?

Well mine is the way that Americans call a starter and main course "entrees and appetizers".

Here comes the fucks.  Sorry.

Entrees and appetizers ?  You are not fucking French!  Even then they get it wrong.  An entree is a first course, an APPETIZER, not the bloody main course itself! 

Americans do not even have what you could really call their own cuisine.  They cook from cuisines all over the world, but do not really have their own (and don't bring up barbecue because that is Caribbean).

For example, I saw a question on Reddit posed as "What is the American equivalent to someone breaking spaghetti in front of an Italian?"  The top answer was cooking a Philly cheek steak incorrectly.  

A FUCKING steak sandwich.

It is enough that they bastardise the English language.  It is herbs, not fucking erbs.    To quote Eddie Izzard, it has a fucking H in it!

Why does this anger me so much?  I have no idea.  

Sorry Americans.  Not sorry.

What irritates you irrationally?

Where Do We Go From Here?

 

When For Women Scotland won the appeal against the Scottish Government which in turn, cemented and clarified in law what we already knew, that women were and have always been biological women; I innocently thought that the fight had, not been won, but that we could move forward on the basis that the ruling would be adhered to.

Oh sweet summer child.

Some organisations have capitulated, the Transit Police for example rolling back their ridiculous decision to give biological men the power to strip search women. 

Crimes will no longer recorded as chosen sex, but the person’s actual sex (although I note some crimes go reported with no sex at all listed).

Many sport associations are no longer allowing men into women’s sports.

What has become apparently however, is that the powers that be simply don’t care about the ruling.

Unison, the country’s biggest union recently allowed a biological man to run for a female seat.  The Labour Women’s Conference has been postponed.   Some NHS Trusts and Local Councils are blatantly ignoring the ruling, still allowing men into women’s toilets and changing rooms, claiming that they need “further guidance”.

What further guidance is needed I ask?  Men cannot ever become biological women or be acknowledged as being so.  So says the Supreme Court.  They therefore do not belong in women’s spaces.

What these organisations are telling us, what the Labour Government is telling us (see also the text messages spread around by MPs after the ruling) is that they do not care.  The ruling means nothing to them and they intend to carry on as they wish.

For Women Scotland went through two judicial reviews and an appeal at the Supreme Court, expending over two hundred thousand pounds in the process to get there, not to mention hundreds of hours of time; only for us now to effectively be told that it doesn’t matter.

So what does this mean for women’s rights? When we win in the highest Court in the land, yet that ruling is simply ignored by those who wish to.

I think in some places the ruling was welcome.  I do not believe that many sport associations wanted a crossover of men in women’s sports, effectively ruining every sport that they entered.  But for many other organisations, Trusts, Councils, the Government; it clearly was not.

The trans agenda brings profit.  It allows control.  It brings a distraction when needed for the Government to wield. 

The trans agenda was welcomed, encouraged, assisted and promoted by those in power because it is useful to them.  Because they have their own agenda.  Why else let organisations mutilate children’s bodies with drugs that stem their growth and reduce their bone density.  Why else tell children that they can be born into the wrong body and that there is a quick fix to all their problems.   Why else wave through women’s bathrooms being made into gender neutral, allow men in our changing rooms and our rape crisis centres, removing our safety and safe spaces in the process.

What do we do now in the question?  Someone brings a Court case for each time the Supreme Court is ignored?  They know that this is going to be an impossible feat, not just from a financial point of view, or the time involved; but also because we now have to wonder, is there any point?

If the Supreme Court are to be ignored which it appears in many cases that they are being, how can we fight this?  Especially when our own Government clearly did not want the ruling and by “postponing” the Women’s Conference, they have made their stance quite clear. 

What I fear is that this will now escalate.  I fear that they will do away with the Equality Act all together, rewriting it so as to make the rights of men who pose and cos play as women, front and centre.

What I see is that the Government allowed this ruling to change the situation in things like sports, but had no intention of following through with anything else.  Which poses the question. 

How far down this rabbit hole of hell are we going to go?