2025 - The Biggest Year of My Life

 2025 was a big one.  The biggest of my life.

My boyfriend and I started 2025 in a flurry of activity.  We had bought a house and were in the process of moving boxes from November 2024 until we finally moved in, in mid January 2025.  This was a big move for me.

I had moved in with my boyfriend two years prior, but his home did not feel like my home.  Anyone who has moved in with someone who previously lived with a long term partner can understand that.  Although I liked the house, it was not truly my home and I knew that I would never be at home there.

My boyfriend had restored that house from the ground up and had a lot of emotion tired to that house, but he knew that I would never be comfortable.  Finding a home perfect for both of us though was less of a challenge than I thought.  The right one appeared and by January, we were in. 

Although there is work to be done and changes to be made, I truly love this house.  It feels like home.  My home.  Our home.  This is the first house of my life that has truly felt like mine.  

So that was the first big change of the year.  The second was my job.  I had been thinking about a change of jobs for a few months, but having been at that job for 25+ years, even thinking about moving was a big thing.  I had truly grown up with that firm, having started there when I turned 18.  Some people still there when I left had seen me grow from a child to a woman and I had a relationship with my boss that I know will never be replicated.  

But the work had changed.  The firm had changed.  I was working and had been for some time in historical abuse and that was taking its toll.  Adding that to a change in ownership and a change in location and all the signs were telling me that it was time to go.

I was lucky enough to be headhunted in March by another firm.  Different department, different work, more pay and the people all seemed to be nice.  So, I made the decision and jumped ship.

My last day with the firm was emotional.  I shed tears when I walked out of the door for the last time but could only hope that I had made the right decision.

Starting at my new job was like starting my career over again.  Although the basis of what I did was the same, the work was completely new and I knew nothing about it.  I was starting to learn again, whilst being in a busy office and from the ground up.  But I found the challenge exhilarating and after the first couple of months of "Can I do this?" the answer was yes, yes I can.

I have been incredibly lucky to move to this new firm where I feel at home.  Where all the staff are fantastic, I made made a close friend in one of my colleagues and the money is better.  My old boss has checked on me a couple of times (I suspect to see if I wanted to come back) and I have bumped into him once.  I had a fantastic working relationship with him and that is something that I will never have again.  The rest of my old work colleagues have been disappointing.  I have not heard from any of them (yes I reached out).  But hey ho.  My life has moved on.

Finally, and most importantly, I have finally found my inner peace.  I have struggled for most of my adult life, but this was the year where I found the tools to put to rest my ghosts.  I reached the point where I could finally exhale.   I had the moment of knowing, right then and there, that everything is now ok.  I am ok.  It was wonderful.  More than wonderful.

Healing can be a long process and the journey can be full of dead ends, side paths and doubling back.  But since that day, I have felt a calm, a peace and happiness like I have never known.  I am now who I was always meant to be.  Unrestrained and unencumbered by pain.  

I have my boyfriend who I adore, a home I love, a job I enjoy, great friends and I have found my peace.  There are no more locked boxes hidden away, no dark corners in the attic of my mind.  There is light there now; and peace and happiness.

I am thankful.