Thoughts and Prayers

Part One

I have been trying and failing to write this post for months.  But I have found it impossible.  For someone who has thoughts on everything and usually writes about them, why can I not put my words on to the screen now?

Which brings me to my first question.  At a time when there so much going on in the world, when did we go onto this auto pilot, merry go round from hell of "thoughts and prayers".  Has social media desensitized us to tragedy?

I remember joining Twitter in the beginning of 2010.  I remember being mocked at the time for joining a site that talked about "what you were having for breakfast".  I joined because I heard there was a great Formula One community on there and I wanted to check it out.

Twitter will always mean a lot to me because it introduced me to that great community.  In time it introduced me to the blogging community and to start my blog in earnest.  It enabled my words.  It encouraged them.  It introduced me to new ideas, new perspectives, causes and campaigns that I have never contemplated before.  It enriched my view on the world and what was happening in it, it educated me and opened me up to new ideas.  My journey into confidence started on Twitter.

My interest in politics started as a result of reading articles and the thoughts of people on Twitter.  It checked my privilege.  It showed me what others face in their lives every day; just for being how they are, for what colour their skin was, who they loved and what they believed.

Fast forward to 2018 and Twitter, and the world, is a different place.

ISIS, bombings, refugees, suicide bombers, school shootings, people being shot and killed by police just because they were black, the rise of Donald Trump and the far right.  Katie Hopkins calling refugees who die in the sea while trying to escape as "cockroaches".  We live now in a place where incels think they should be allocated women and celebrate mass shootings.  Where neo Nazis march the streets screaming "white power" and run down people where they stand.

We live in a time where death threats and hate speech is common place and any objection to them is called "taking away free speech".   We live in a time where an MP can receive 600 rape threats in one night. 

A place where Donald Trump can label anything he doesn't like as #fakenews which his followers lap up and escalate.  Where actual fake news stories can lead to a man shooting up a pizzeria because he was told that it was a pedophile ring.

A time when family members of the Manchester bombing victims are trolled and accused of faking their sibling's death.  Where conspiracy theories run rife about the shootings at Sandy Hook and Las Vegas.  Where children who have survived a school shooting are being accused of being crisis actors.

Something seems to happen every damn day and with each new tragedy, the desensitization seems to escalate.  A tragedy happens, we post about thoughts and prayers and wonder, blindly, how this could happen whilst simultaneously, subconsciously, waiting for the next thing to happen. Then the cycle begins again.

How did we get to a place where the right wing media, politicians and gun lovers are attacking and ridiculing children, who have survived a horrendous school shooting, for making a stand for gun control.  Where instead of fire drills, children practice what to do if a school shooting happens.

I don't recognise this place; yet it is the world we are living in.  We bounce from one tragedy to another, without some seemingly understanding the implications, the scale and the seriousness.  We say "thoughts and prayers" without registering anything.

Is this what we are now?  Have I articulated this how I want?  I'm not sure.

What I do know is that there is still good in the world.  Voices that will not be drowned out.  People helping people.  People rising up, standing up and saying "No".

Talk about this comes in Part 2 of this blog.

7 of the Coolest Wall Décor Ideas

When it comes to interior design, there’s no doubt that it’s a delicate art form. It takes a keen eye for trends, and how to effectively use a space to its full potential. One key element of any room is its walls. The colour acts as a background to allow your furniture and accessories stand out. However, your walls don’t need to just be a background – they can easily be transformed into the room’s main event. Here’s 7 of the coolest wall designs to give you some inspiration:

1. Wood Feature Walls

Often create by laying wood flooring across a wall, this is a style that looks amazing in both contemporary and traditional homes. Due to its durability and vast range of styles to choose from, it’s a popular choice for both longevity and appearance. When paired with wood flooring (that’s actually laid on the floor), it can make a room look much; laid vertically it makes a room appear longer, whereas horizontal wood on the walls gives the impression of a wider space.

2. Wall Gallery

If you’re a big admirer of art, or have a particularly big collection of family photos that you’d like to showcase, an eclectic gallery wall might be the way to go. By contrasting colours you can draw visitors’ eyes to its busy design. Alternatively, going for a more unified colour scheme will make the design flow easier, and almost merge all the features into one singular piece of art.

3. Patterned Textures

There’s so much scope for originality on this one, and the only restriction is how wild you’re willing to go with it. From extravagant textures to simple and unified patterns, differing texture sad depth and character to a room’s design – and it can have an explosive effect even covering a small part of a wall’s total surface area.

4. Mirrors

It’s one of the oldest tricks in the book; hand a large mirror, and the space will instantly look larger and more spacious. This can be achieved through one large mirror, or a more decorative approach of hanging a number of smaller mirrors. They also help to bounce light around the room, making the space brighter and more inviting.

5. Tapestry

A good quality tapestry can make a world of different if you’re looking to make a statement. There’s so many design out there to choose from, it should be an easy job finding one that fits with your existing style. You can go for full wall coverage, or hang it like a piece of art as a commendable wall feature.

6. Photo Splitting

If you’ve got a particularly large piece of art that you’d like to showcase, or a huge photo you adore that you’d like to take centre stage, then splitting that photo can make it have even more of an impact. Bearing in mind if you’re doing this with art, expensive original pieces are officially excluded from this one! The split in the image warrants a second glance by visitors, and prevents it being overlooked as just another colossal hanging frame.

7. Patterned Wallpaper

Although this has been around for decades, there’s always a place for good patterned wallpaper when it comes to interior design. Foliage themes are very trendy right now, and the light colours draw the eye more than just a brightly coloured paint would.

Setting The Ambiance Of Your Home

Pexels

Setting the ambience of your most cherished home space is important. Not only does it give you somewhere pleasant to retire to after all the work of the day is finished, but it affords you an opportunity to practice self-love. After all, a messy, disorganized home is sure to give you a message. It says ‘you are not living up to your potential, and you know it.’ That’s hardly a positive message to be exposed to every morning. A room is filled with stories, meaning that it can be important to understand how those stories affect you and your space on a daily basis. People who are the most self-actualized and organized usually have tidy home spaces.

However, tidying and cleaning a home is easy. You know what to do after purchasing the products and a quick Google. But is there more to this? Could the ambience, and every other furnishing decision you make have a much larger impact on what your room is trying to tell you? Of course.

If you hope to improve your home space to become a place you truly love and hope to reside in, yet you’re not sure where to start, you are for sure in the right place. The following advice should hopefully help you achieve exactly what you have been desiring:

Lighting

Lighting is the number one depictor of how ambient your room is. It sets the mood, and provides the visual cue to perceive everything else in your bedroom. You know when you enter a loving bedroom with dimmed warm lights? That’s so much better and relaxing than simply having a bright white night lamp illuminating the room. But there’s more to this than just purchasing the correct lighting fixture, although that can help.

First, we’d recommend ensuring that your home lights are energy bulbs where you can afford them. Not only does this save you money over a period of time, but the slow illumination of the bulb also does wonders to slowly make the room transform into your space, rather than quickly and bluntly lighting the place. It can be more of a romantic feeling to allow for this slow burn to happen. Also, consider the direction the light is pointing in. If a corner light isn’t illuminating the room as well as it could be, you might want to shift positions, especially if it’s distracting you or taking away from the focal point of the room.

Next, you want to ensure that your natural light is having its time in the day. Natural light from the sun will always be better than anything you can install or buy in a home furnishing store, and this light can be customized and directed to a degree using custom indoor blinds first and foremost. You might also decide to get a little jazzy with the whole affair, installing LED’s around the backlight of your television or along your bookshelf. Just be sure to have no more than two or three lights in your room at any one time (depending on size,) because there is such as thing as clashing light, and this can take away from the design. There’s no problem with having many lighting fixtures in a single room, so long as you’re happy that you can tailor and customize them depending on the room you’re in.

Ambient light can also make for a great personal statement. For example, a cursive pink neon sign above your bed that states ‘Queen’ can certainly add to the showmanship with which you consider your self-worth, adding a little bit of fun to the whole affair. Life is short, so why not?

Music

While it’s not exactly a home feature to install from a hardware store, ambience is almost exclusively dictated by the music you play. However, you need to get this right. You might be the biggest metalhead in the world, but do you really want that playing loudly in all rooms of your house? Not to mention the aggressive you’ll likely receive from your neighbors.

With the prevalence of Spotify and Apple Music, alongside features that afford playing different music in every room, this has never been easier to set up. You might consider making a few deep playlists filled with beautiful music you enjoy. For example, a great classical soundtrack during your introspective reading moments, or lighthearted jazz or soulful music whenever you’re making dinner. Whatever makes you shake  your tailfeather is usually quite a good option to choose first and foremost. Even if you live alone, this can be a wonderful way to spice up the interior taste of your home. The best homes always have an undercurrent of rhythm and music, and this is the most direct way to achieve that.

What do you think new people entering your home will be impressed by first? Your three thousand dollar coffee table, or the relaxed and smooth tones of jazz welcoming them into a home with love? We’d say sensory perceptions overwrite all.

Scent

That’s right, your home has a fragrance. You might remember heading over to the houses of friends in your childhood, and noticing that their house smelled exactly the way their laundry did. Homes have their own smell that builds up for many reasons, such as the fragrances they use, the detergent they clean with, and usually the amount of pets they have. We have stated that sensory perception overwrites all, so this is a great place to also start. For example, using odor replacement sprays and installing timed fragrances in the main rooms of your home (especially the entrance!) can help things smell more inviting when someone new comes in.

If you have pets, ensuring they are washed regularly can help, as can designating an exact space where they eat, drink and sleep (not your bedroom!) If you know people are coming round, keeping a nice assortment of scented candles can also work wonders in helping your home feel and look stunningly inviting.

With these tips, you can be sure that your home has the most ambience of all in your area.

10 Things You Should Always Keep In Your Car In Winter

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When I was in my late teens, I had a job that involved a daily commute of a two hour round trip.

I remember that my mum used to hate that I was driving so much during peak hours of travel and would worry about me getting to work everyday, especially when it was winter and the nights were dark.

There are of the basic things to keep on top of when you have a daily commute, like making sure that you have a spare tyre, jump leads and more than enough fuel for each journey as well as ensuring that your vehicle is regularly appraised by a mechanic for safety checks. See Cars.Com for more tips and details with regard to this.

As a woman travelling a distance alone, I was also conscious that I needed to not only make sure that my car was safe to drive, but also to make sure that I felt safe.  If your car breaks down on a dark road (which happens to me on a few occasions), you want to be able to feel as safe and secure as you can.

The first time that I broke down in my car and I was alone, I remember being unprepared, freezing and more than a little scared.  It was winter, 6.30pm at night and other than my mobile phone, I had nothing useful in my car at all.

After a two hour wait for roadside assistance in sub zero temperatures, I swore never again.  I created a kit of things that I would need if my car broke down to assist me.

• A spare charger for my phone which could be plugged into my car for charging en route
• A flashlight.
• De-icer and an ice scraper
• A warm jumper or coat, thick socks and a spare pair of boots.
• Road map.
• Loose change for payphone in case your phone does not work.
• A couple of snack/nutrition bars.
• The details of your insurance company details and a reliable garage on a piece of paper (don't rely solely on your mobile).
• First aid kit.
• An umbrella.

I used to keep a box of these things tucked away in the boot of my car, with the essentials kept in the glove box.

What do you keep in your car?

How To Keep Your Costs Down

This year I am going on my first holiday abroad in eight years.  I am massively excited and have vowed to take enough money with me to be able to do everything I want without having to budget.  There is nothing worse when you are on holiday than having to turn down trips or outings because you can’t afford it.  By planning ahead and making sure I have more than enough to spend, I am hoping to have a fabulous time.

Saving for a holiday and lots of spending money takes time, effort and creativity.  I have been looking at ways that I can make extra savings in my everyday life and wanted to share what I have been doing.

Travel

I noticed one day on the bus after buying my daily return ticket that someone was using a pass.  After becoming friendly at the bus stop day by day (as you do), it turned out that she used a monthly pass, which it turns out has saved me a fortune every month!  The weekly passes also offer a great saving and I use them if I am having some time off work and would not need the full month pass.

Using a megarider ticket, you will be able to travel as much as you want and can tailor your own needs to the ticket type. Whether you’re in need of a weekly bus pass for your travels, or a monthly one — you will find yourself making a huge saving in comparison to buying a ticket every day.

In the alternative, if you’re a driver, did you know that the average motorist in the UK will spend an astonishing £168,880 over their lifetime? I made transition from car driver to bus traveller around eight years ago and I have saved so much money since that time, not to mention it being better for the environment.

Lifestyle

Coffee

According to research carried out by MyVoucherCode, people in the UK visit coffee shops at least three times per week.  I confess that I had an addition to a roasted hazelnut latte with extra espresso shot for a couple of years that was costing me £3.20 a time.  When you add that up, going usually 3 times a week for my indulgence, that is nearly £40.00 a month on just coffee!

Branded coffee company, Douwe Egberts, has said that a 250g pack of ground coffee can make up to 30 cups. When looking to see how much a 1kg pack would cost, Amazon has priced the coffee at around £15, meaning that each cup of coffee would cost close to 13p. These days I either take a flask of coffee to work or my cafetiere.

Lunch

Many of us find it easier to just buy lunch on the way to work — or popping out on our lunch breaks. But what if we told you that, on average, forking out for lunch every day could cost you £1,288 according to research carried out by VoucherCloud.

You can make a huge saving by preparing your lunch at home — whether it be a simple sandwich, a prepared salad that you make in the morning or some soup to heat up.

I recently just starting making soup myself for a more healthy option.  I recently made a red pepper & celery soup which was delicious.  I managed to get 5 portions out of the soup which I worked out cost me 33 pence per portion.  Cheaper than a tin of soup and much healthier!

Holiday Wrecker: 4 Things That Ruin A Perfectly Good Trip

Bags? Check. Boarding passes? Check. Passports? Check.

Everything is in order and you’re ready to jet off on a well-deserved break. Hopefully, it will be perfect and nothing will ruin the experience. Sadly, holidays don’t always go to plan as unforeseen circumstances get in the way. The term suggests they are difficult to spot ahead of time, but the truth is that most of us are the architects of our downfall. Yep, you will do the things that put your enjoyment in jeopardy.

It’s a hard pill to swallow, but don’t sit around and mope. Instead, continue reading and see how you can avoid the holiday wreckers like the plague.

Over-Planning

Planning too many activities is a weird one to get right because you don’t want to miss out. FOMO is real and it can destroy a holiday just as easily as over-planning. Still, always remember that spontaneity is one of the cornerstones of an amazing trip. With that in mind, create a loose plan but don’t stick to it religiously. Rather, rank the day’s activities from top to bottom and try to tick as many off the list as possible. As a rule, make sure you see the sights which are the most important. After that, just the let the day guide you in the right direction.

Not Researching

Attempting not to over-plan isn’t an excuse to give up on research altogether. Everyone wants to see the sights and experience the culture, and online sleuthing is essential. Otherwise, you’ll never know what is on and you won’t experience a genuine night on the town or local meal. The trick is to use the Web is to figure out what is happening and how to get involved. Simply type the dates and location into a search engine of your choice and check out the famous events and hidden gems.

Online Dating

A bit of fun in the sun never hurt anyone. That is poetry at its finest! The thing is that Tindering on holiday can escalate out of control. One minute you’re swiping because you’re curious, and the next you’re knee deep in the smoking versus vaping picture argument. There’s nothing wrong with updating your profile to maximise matches, but don’t let Tinder and Bumble get in the way of having fun. Try and use the apps when you have free time. Or, go to a coffee shop or a bar to chat with someone the old-fashioned way.

Under Budgeting

Spending too much can impact your life back home, and that is crucial to remember. Still, a holiday is the time to relax and splurge because they don’t come around very often. Regarding your budget, take another look at the numbers and see what you can swing. Firstly, decide whether the original amount per day is plenty or too little. Then, think about how much extra you can spend without slipping into the red. Use a guidebook like the Lonely Planet if you are unsure of rates and costs.

Can you think of any more holiday wreckers that have ruined a trip in the past?

Plus Size Workwear Wishlist

One thing that I love about working in an office is that I get to dress up.  Where I work it is not required that you wear a suit, as long as you look smart and put together.

I am definately one who is never knowingly under dressed and like to experiment with different styles and patterns whilst still looking professional at work.

Here are some of my current favourites on my wishlist.

1   Missguided Twist Dress £35.00

2   River Island dress £60.00

3   Very bodycon dress £19.80

4   BooHoo   Flare Sleeve Blazer £10.00

5   RiverIsland Duster Coat £65.00

6   DorothyPerkins Peplum Pencil Skirt £6.30

Interesting Facts About The Olympics

Please note that this is not a sponsored post, I just found the content really interesting and relevant given the Winter Olympics

My Dream House

As I have mentioned on this blog before, I am currently saving to buy my own house (slightly curtailed by the fact that I am going on two holidays this year!  Allowing myself however as I haven't had a holiday abroad in 8 years).

Although my saving had been slightly derailed, I have my plans in place including a lifetime savings ISA where the government gives you an additional 25% to whatever you have saved.  That's how you turn an £8000 deposit into £10000!

I want to make sure that I have enough money to do everything I want in the house.  I don't want to buy a house and then not do it up the way that I want.  While I am in a position to save and I am more than happy living with my mum (who is amazing!), it makes sense to save long enough to get everything I want.  

Ok, maybe not, but a girl can dream, right?

So what do I want in my new house?  Hardwood flooring is a must for me.  Easy to clean, classic looking.  I like clean lines, statement pieces and clever ideas to transport you to somewhere else.

I like white walls.  I am not afraid to admit it!  White is the perfect backdrop to create any look that you want.  A perfect look for the lounge which should be comfortable, uncluttered and not fussy with a statement piece such as a huge print on the wall rather than having a feature wall.  A comfortable settee and a large TV for watching all of those box sets is also a must.

I love something like this, although in my mind you need to have a bright colour in there somewhere.  Perhaps some colourful cushions on the settee to go with the modern style furnishings.

I love the idea of using wall murals such as I featured in my link to completely change a space.  Have a room with no window?  No problem.  Turn it into an office, paint the walls white and use a full wall mural to create a view of Paris.

The one place that I do want a sense of opulence and utra comfort and style is my bedroom.  I dream of a thick carpet, a big bed, furnishings with a nod to French boudoir style.  A dressing table (something I have never had!).  

Your bedroom should be calming, comfortable, an escape and more than anything, a place of retreat and escape.  My dream, although I will never get that with my first, or maybe even my second house, would be to have a little balcony leading off the bedroom where I could sit and have a coffee and look at the world.

So what do you think of my dream house?

All images from Pixabay with exception of mural photograph which is obtained from a previous blog post.