4 August 2013

Feeling Foxy

When it gets to this time of year I start to look for dresses that can make the transition from Summer to Autumn just with a change of accessories.   If that dress can also work for either day or night time, it gets extra bonus points!

I recently spotted the South Lace Insert Day Dress in +Very.co.uk and was immediately drawn to the beautiful lace detailing around the neck and chest, combined with the fox print of the dress.  I knew that I could make it work for both seasons and dress it up or down, so it went straight into my shopping bag.



Today I have been trying to figure out how to wear this dress for an upcoming night out with the girls, so decided to take a few pictures to show you.  I would equally wear this dress at work too, just toning it down a little when Autumn arrives with a black cardigan and some opaque tights.



Shoes from +Next , bracelet was a present



What have you been buying lately?


2 August 2013

The End is Nigh



First of all, phew!!  That was much more hard of a slog than I ever thought it was going to be.  Posting every day, plus doing your normal blogs is damn hard work, especially also trying to juggle a full time job and some semblance of a social life!

Thank you to all the other ladies involved in this challenge who took up the gauntlet with me.  I think I managed to do about 27 of the 30 which isn’t bad, although I think Nikki from Natty Nikki has to do all 30 and I can only applaud.

On the original list that I used, Day 30 was supposed to be entitled “Letting Go” whilst Day 31, which I didn’t notice (hence the name of the challenge) was “A Vivid Memory”.   I am swapping these days around and stopping at Day 30.  I will, along with a few others I bet, be falling to the floor in exhaustion after that many posts, and sharing that many things.

So on to Day 30 – A Vivid Memory

In 2009 my best friends and I decided to go away for the New Year break to Portugal.   This was the first really bad Winter that England had had and frankly we were grateful to be anywhere that didn’t have snow.

On New Year’s Eve we decided to go out for a meal and a cocktail or two.  After a cocktail or four we ended up at small local Portuguese bar, right near the beach a little before midnight.

As New Year hit and fireworks were being set off on the cliff nearby, we decided to run down the beach to the sea (cocktail fuelled).  I remember standing there, with my toes in the sea, happy, with my best friends and thinking that there was nowhere on earth than I would rather be.

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Now you will notice that behind us in this picture is a wave.    We didn’t notice this wave until it hit us, covering us waist deep in sea water.  Oops.

It didn’t matter.  We laughed, rung the sea water out of our clothes and went back to the bar for a drink, where the locals, bundled up in big coats called us “You crazy English”!  We were.  That’s part of why we get on so well.

Check out the other ladies for the last time in the challenge.  Thank you for reading.

1 August 2013

Great Expectations

First, a Very Long Foreword 

I wrote this post a couple of weeks ago, before the veritable shitstorm that happened and is still happening on Twitter in what seems to be escalating into a full out war between men and women.

Putting my two pence worth in, in relation to the banning lad’s mags, do I want them banned?  As long as women are happy to be paid to pose in them and men want to read them, carry on as far as I am concerned.

Lads mags have been around for decades and no children’s minds have been warped as a result of seeing a naked/half naked body on the front of a cover. 

Both men’s and women’s bodies are splayed over countless magazines in various forms of dress and undress and all telling you how the “ideal body” should be.  All magazines show images of how we are “supposed” to look and banning lad’s magazines won’t do a damn thing.

If you don’t like a magazine, don’t buy it.  Censorship of what we see and think is already up on the up, let’s not help it.  If you object to the magazines purely for prudish reasons, then I suggest you simply don't buy them and avert your eyes. 

 
With regard to the absolutely horrendous abuse that Caroline Craido Perez and others have been experiencing this week, the level of rape and death threats have astounded me.  It is easy to say "just block and report" to someone, but how is that even possible when at one point she was receiving upwards of 50 threats AN HOUR.

I applaud Caroline for not staying quiet and for instead, shouting back.  Staying quiet in the face of abuse never solved anything. 

This isn't men v women or visa versa.  Women don't hate all men and not all men are rapists.  We are talking about a small section of the population here who are throwing abuse.  It needs to be dealt with, but talks of things like a Twitter strike isn't the way forward.  I am not sure what is.  Whether a “report” button will work on Twitter, I have my doubts as it could quite clearly work in the troll’s favour too.

Back to my original post

What I have wrote below has long been society’s view of women, and in society I include men and women because we are accountable in some ways for views and assumptions that are still maintained.

So here is what I originally wrote:

Sometimes I think that we pass through life with one person after another imposing on you who you should be, what you should look like, what you should wear, what is appropriate to say, do, think.  Everyone has an opinion and sometimes, your opinion seems to be at the bottom of the pile.

What I was thinking about today was how much of that have we assimilated?  Are we drinking the Kool Aid of what we should and shouldn’t do, say, think, be?

Some of it is what society tells us, some is passed down through our families and some through popular culture.  I was always told for example (from various sources) that “A lady doesn’t swear” .  Well fuck that.

Recently Joanna Lumley told us that women shouldn’t wear provocative clothing… Although I think she worded it as “Silly girls in silly dresses”.  Victim blaming is nothing new, and it comes from both sexes.

If you think about all the things that women are supposed to be and do, the list is quite astonishing.  In more than one corner of the world, all of them will be said to you or be presumed of you at some point.

A lady shouldn’t swear.
If you wear provocative clothing, you are “asking for it”.
Dress conservatively and you will classed as matronly or an old maid.
You must conform with society’s version of attractive.
A lady should be quiet, subservient, well spoken.
Be a lady in the kitchen and a whore in the bedroom.
“Putting out” on the third date is expected.
Remember: No man will buy the cow if he’s getting the milk for free.
You must remain perfectly groomed at all times.
All woman want children.  If you don’t there is is something wrong with you.
A man shouting “Nice tits, can I cop a feel” at you across the street should be replied with a smile not a rebuke.
You can have control of your own body, but only if society says that you can.
Be thin.  If you aren’t then any abuse you receive is your own fault.
Be a “good” girl (whatever that is).  Nice guys don’t marry bad girls.
 The list goes on and on and on.  I can’ listen anymore because it is getting depressing.   How many of you have heard had many of the above said or applied to you.  I certainly have.  You cannot possibly be all of these things all at the same time.  It's possible.  So let's not be.

It’s for change ladies.   It’s time to rip up the goddamn rule book and do things our way. 

“The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud.”

Coco Chanel