5 August 2020

Why The Only Box I Will Tick is Woman

I previously wrote a post about why I decided to become label free in my life.




Removing the labels that I, and others, had placed on me was a very freeing experience and allowed me to look at, review and analyse every piece of information that I came across without the restraints and expectations that so many of my previous labels had placed on me. 





There is one label, not a label really but a description that I will not remove.  I am a woman.  That will never change and I will defend that word and the correct usage of it as long as I have breath in my body.





We cannot change our biology and we have no need to do so.  A controversial opinion, for some, in today's ever changing climes.





The word woman describes our biology, but does not define what kind of woman we are.  This does not change no matter what our sexual attraction is, what our personality traits are or how we choose to outwardly represent ourselves to the world.





The so called traits of being a woman are based on what society perceives and has placed on what a woman can be.   But we can be anything we choose to be.  Except the opposite sex.  Because there truly is no need.





So much of my personality and who I am fits into what the word woman has come to mean.  I wear dresses pretty much exclusively.  I am shaped in what is described as a womanly shape.  I enjoy makeup.  I am shy.  Parts of me could be described as submissive (that one was hard for my previous feminist self to admit).  I demur when I shouldn't.





Those traits are all ones that transwomen emulate and outwardly portray as evidence that they are women.





Yet, I also have what society deems as traits belonging to a man.





I love motor racing.  I am not afraid to say what I think or share my opinions.  I am confident and can be forthright.  I will not back down when I believe I am right.  I can be assertive.  I see what I want and go for it.





I also am not motherly (apart from adoring my furry puppa), nor have I ever wanted children.





Today, that would probably be described as being non binary.  I am not non binary.  I am a woman. 





When you accept the sum of your parts, there is no need to define yourself as anything else.   Our biology is our physical parts and make up.  It does not define who we are and it never should.  Only woman can bear a child.  Only women can menstruate.  





Gender is a social construct.  





When you remove the constraints and constrictions that society places on you, you can truly be free to be who you are.  





That ultimately is where the transgender argument falls flat and becomes irrelevant.  Because being a woman or a man is not a feeling.  It is not a personality trait or a behaviour.  It is biology.





In a world where it is ever more important to put labels on yourself and place yourself into a box, the most important thing you can do is accept you are and embrace it.  You are a woman, or a man.  To claim otherwise ultimately is delusion and can only lead to unhappiness and denial.  Neither is healthy.










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