21 October 2019

My Name Isn't Jack

*For those who came here from @WhatJackThinks - I'm sorry, my name isn't Jack.  I am a woman.  Let me explain.

A couple of weeks ago I saw a man on Twitter who had conducted an experiment by creating an account as a woman, talking about the same issues and having the same stance as himself.  You can read about it below:



His experiment was supposed to last for 3 days, however on the third day before he could end it, his alter ego account was banned.  During that time he gained 250+ supporters and gave him a perspective that can only really be experienced, not learned second person.  I highly recommend you read his thread.

Michael's social experiment interested me as someone who had started talking about gender critical issues 6 months ago (for those who are inexperienced with the term, specifically how trans rights are affecting and reducing women's and children's rights which affects society as a whole).  

For me, entering the gender critical world is a little like being Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz (go with me on this).

If you are a woman, you are Dorothy when she begins her journey on the yellow brick road.  She does not know how long the road is, how hard the journey will be; who is friend and who is foe and is not even sure about where she is going.  She befriends a few people along the way, but she is constantly attacked by flying monkeys and an evil witch on a broomstick trying to stop her at every turn.  It is not an easy journey.  But it IS rewarding in the end.

If you are a man, you are Dorothy when her house has just landed on the wicked witch.  She did not do anything to accomplish this herself, but she is surrounded by applause and is given a parade.  She literally lands on the scene by accident and is given the keys to the city.

This was my belief prior to this experiment and I wanted to see how true my belief was.  What actually happens when a man joins a highly charged debate.  I wanted to try and do this as fairly as possible.   I knew what my journey has been like over the past 6 months and I had my presumptions, as above, about how men experienced that same journey.

So, I created Jack.  I had a spare account already created last June that was not being used (apart from reading tweets from those who had banned me), so decided to update it and give it to my alter ego, Jack, the plumber from London who was new to the gender critical (GC) debate but whose interested had been sparked by his girlfriend.


I decided beforehand to give the experiment a week and see how it went.  What happened was an absolute whirlwind.

I started by following a few generic accounts.  Match of the Day, Playstation, the Daily Mail etc.  Although I told a couple of people about my experiment, I followed no gender critical (GC) accounts.  I wanted organic traffic and follows because of what I was saying, not because I followed them first.

By the end of the first day, not saying anything profound or anything that had not been said by female members of the GC community many, many times before, Jack was a hit.  Within 24 hours, he had 501 followers.



Although I expected some curiosity about the account as men are fairly thin on the ground in the GC community, I never expected so many followers in one day.  I could not keep up with the notifications.

My follower traffic remained organic.  I followed some recommended accounts suggested to me by others, around 20ish I think, but apart from those, every single follower found me.  I did not expect this, certainly not at this level.

Aside from the follower account growing by the second, I was flooded with helpful suggestions of who to follow, articles to read, links to follow; what not to say, how to navigate not be banned by Twitter.   

Men of the GC community followed and popped into my mentions and DMs to say hi.  The advice from men and women was abundant and something I had never experienced as a woman joining the debate 6 months ago.   Even Graham Linehan popped up in my DMs sharing his latest post.

As a woman, respect and trust had to be earned.  There is a reason why the vast majority of us are anonymous on Twitter.

Tweets that I posted, again, nothing special in terms of what I said, received hundreds of likes and retweets.  Like somehow, my words as a man, had more authority.  Were worth sharing more than women who tweet day in and day out about the same issues.


I confess that tweeting accounts that my main account was banned from gained me some pleasure.  As a man I also somehow felt that I could get away with more.  In the majority, my belief held apart from one block, from Rachel McKinnon.




My tweets got more pointed, more up to the minute with the news and things happening on Twitter; more in line with my own account, although absolutely fueled and emboldened by my alter ego.  

On day 2, after the tweet above about putting children on puberty blockers, the TRAs found me.  Generally the discourse was different than I experienced on my own account.  Although highly charged, the tweets exchanged were more of an argument and a facts debate rather than abuse, threats and dismissing my words out of hand.

I felt safe.  The worst thing someone called me was a "little boy" as opposed to on my own account where I have been called TERF scum, evil, a transphobic whore, a far right slut.  

I started to receive a few tweets from women about my surging popularity and how I was being given more leverage as a man.  That tweets I received, would have received threats had I been a woman.  I could not disagree as I have seen it, first hand and is documented, many times.  Example below has had account names removed, but the full screenshot is on the link above.

Men do not, in the GC community, to my knowledge (please feel free to correct me and I will update), do not receive this kind of abuse.   They are not threatened with being fucked by a baseball bat for saying that men cannot become women.    

I confess that I lost my way a little in those first few days, completely overwhelmed by the attention and number of notifications.  Some people were a little suspicious.  Jack even got his own thread on Mumsnet with some willing to give the benefit of the doubt and others thinking that it was a sock puppet account or an amusing parody.

I awoke on day 3 to find I had been given a 12 hour ban.  I am not proud of the tweet that received the ban as it is nothing I would normally ever say.  As Jack I felt like I could say what I wanted, as it turned out, I couldn't.  That said, although rude, it did not direct hate, did not misgender.  "Go play in traffic, fuckwit" however was not my finest hour.  I'm sorry I said it.



During my 12 hour ban I decided to perform the search that many GC people have done.  The Twitter shadowban test (although Twitter claim that they do not shadowban anyone).  The results shocked me.  My main account as I knew, was shadowbanned.  Jack was also shadowbanned, but also had a suggestion for a search ban.

This may be down to the amount of traffic the account had attracted in that 3 days, but still, checking two of the list was surprising after only a few days on Twitter. 


 So here we are, at the end of my 7 day experiment.  

As Jack, I certainly received much MUCH more leeway, exposure, advice and boosting than I ever did as a woman.  I know that this is the experience of the very vast majority of the women in the GC community.  He received a 12 hour ban that I did not expect (although I have never said something like that on my own account & have been confrontational; I have not received a ban, yet).

One thing I have noticed from this experiment is that on my main account I myself have found myself retweeting men as much as women, which is disproportionate given my man to woman ratio of the people I follow.  That is something I will address going forward on my own Twitter account.

Jack was also deboosted and had a suggested search ban at an alarming rate given the number of days on Twitter, but I do have to wonder about the high volume of traffic versus the rarity of a man joining the community rather than a woman.

I am sad to let Jack go.  I felt so free with that account to say what I wanted, although my experiment did show that men do receive some of the same results as women.  But not, as I suspected, the same abuse and threats as women do.

He also managed to gain 800+ followers in 7 days whereas on my main account, I am on just over 500, over a period of 6 months.



I would be interested to see what would happen in other communities.  So far the results in the gun control and gender critical community have been very similar.

To those who followed me, gave me advice, tips and support, I am sorry if you felt deceived.  I hope that you can understand the point of this experiment and that I did not intend to hurt anyone or take advantage.

Signing out now as Jack, returning back to my home at @RipleysChoice.

17 October 2019

5 Essentials For A Romantic Weekend Away




Planning a romantic weekend away can be extremely exciting, yet incredibly stressful. With so many important things to consider before you set off on your weekend away, you need to be sure you’re being as organised as you can possibly be. From packing your suitcase to coming up with an itinerary of things to do, the more you plan in advance the better. With that in mind, here are 5 essentials for a romantic weekend away: 

- A Budget Set In Advance

One of the first things you need to do when planning a romantic weekend away is set yourself a budget in advance. Whether this means setting yourself a budget for your travel and accommodation or setting a spending money budget, you need to be sure you know exactly how much your trip is going to cost. For a guide to setting a budget for your vacation, you can visit this site here. 

- A Suitcase Filled With Clothes

Once you’ve set your budget and worked out where you’re going, you need to ensure you’re packing all of the essentials. From two-three day time outfits and toiletries to comfortable walking shoes and coats, it’s important you’re thinking of absolutely everything. If you’re unsure, you might want to consider finding a weekend packing list online. 

- Something Special For The Evenings

As you’re going to be going on a romantic getaway, you might want to pack something a little extra for the evenings. Whether that means packing some incredible sexy underwear or packing a stunning dress for a nice meal, you need to think about how you can make your romantic weekend away memorable. If you’re looking for incredible underwear for your trip, you can find sexy thongs and g strings here

- An Itinerary Of The Most Romantic Spots To Visit 

Another important thing to consider when it comes to your romantic weekend away is whether or not you have a plan of where you want to go. Although some people prefer to take things one day at a day, most people like to make a plan of the places they like to visit beforehand. Not only will this allow you to visit all of the most romantic places but it will also help ensure you don’t miss anything. For a guide to setting an itinerary for vacation, you can visit this site here. 

- A Sense Of Adventure

Finally, you need to be sure you have a sense of adventure. Although you’re heading away to spend time with your partner, you also want to ensure you’re exploring as much as you can. Whether this means spending the day wandering through a new city or booking yourself onto an incredible excursion, the more you experience on your trip the better. 

Are you heading on a romantic weekend away soon? What essentials do you need to ensure you're packing? Did we miss anything off the list? Let me know all of your thoughts and ideas in the comments section below.

15 October 2019

Storing Your Life

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Whether you are the type of person who never throws anything away or you ruthlessly have a cull every few months, storage is something that is key to having a tidy life.  

Storage is an important part of family life, but what we often forget to do however is think outside of the box when it comes to solving the problem of where to store items that you don't want to throw away, but don't have the room for.  

Having a cull of items you don't have room for may end up with a tidier home, but if you are anything like me, inevitably you will discover soon after are things that you wanted to, or should have kept but didn't.  

Not just objects, but memories.  Treasures that you did not realise that you treasured, until they are at the tip or have been donated.

Books that you decided you would not read again and then miss.  Photographs of events from long past that you want to reminisce with, but have been thrown them.  Furniture that you didn't need in your old house, but would have worked perfectly in your new home.  Even things like those winter coats that are past their best and don't fit in your cupboard, but would have been perfect for walking the dog.

Your attic, if you have one, is one solution, but damp, moths and who knows what else always eventually take their toll.  So what to do?




One option and an option that I use on a regular basis is renting a storage unit.  Specifically for my locality, I use Shurgard Self-Storage Woolwich

The reason I chose Shurgard was firstly because of easy to use website.  You can choose the size of the unit that you want and reserve online, paying only a pound for the first month and then a fixed amount each month, depending on the size of the unit.  There is also no minimum contract.

Renting a storage unit can solve so many problems.  When renovating your home and you need to store your furniture or box up everything while you decorate, renting a secure place to keep them is ideal.

If you are the kind of person that regularly culls your home of items, a storage unit can be the place you put things until you make your final decision.  It gives you time rather than having to decide whether to throw something away in the spur of the moment.

A storage unit also gives you the option of long term storage.  If you are looking to upsize your home and want to buy pieces gradually for it, a storage unit can be the place where they can be ready and waiting for your new home.

You don't have to rent a large space, you can get a 15ft square unit for less than £14 a month to store things like necessary documents that have somehow filled a filing cabinet as well as the odds and ends that you have accumulated over the years that you don't want to throw away.  Your child's old toys for example that are no use to you when the child has outgrown them, but the memories are irreplaceable.  

Have you ever thrown anything away that you have regretted.  I bet, like me, you can think of many things.  This is a possible and workable solution at a reasonable rate.

Why not try it out?