3 August 2018

What To Wear To Every Kind of Hen Do


Hen parties have evolved in recent years, changing from an all-out clubbing and drinking session to focusing on the bride-to-be. It's a day for her and her closest friends and family to celebrate!

The parties are as varied as the brides, with some preferring spa days and others planning to dance the night away. Whatever the hen do plans, be ready with our guide of what to wear from plus size tops retailer, QUIZ. 

A touch of sophistication: afternoon tea

Is the bride-to-be wanting something a little quieter than is tradition? If so, make sure all the girls put the same amount of outfit-prep effort in as they would for a big night out by investing in chic occasion dresses. Think elegant and fun — bold floral prints, pastel colours, and stylish hem and necklines evoke the perfect air of old-time glamour.

A soft toned, frill-front dress would be perfect for an afternoon tea; try a soft lemon colour or powder blue. Wrap-round and Bardot styles will also ooze sophistication and offer figure-flattering outlines, or you can go for simple but effective chic in a midi or maxi dress with a shot chiffon jacket in a complementary shade. We recommend dressing up your look with simple jewellery, a clutch bag and low-heel court shoes — dressed to impress but comfortable enough for a few hours of food and drinks.


A night on the town: partying

There’s no better time to party than a hen do! No matter where you go, you’ll want to look sensational on a hen do night out. So, plan your outfit ahead of schedule.

Stay on trend with a retro ‘80s vibe to your outfit. Go for high-waisted shorts and a square-shoulder satin blouse or try a ruched velvet dress with huge hoops and a chunky necklace. Fusing different, bold shades in one look is also a top trend from recent global fashion shows, but don’t forget that asymmetric cuts, figure-hugging fabrics and bare shoulders are also ideal for the party look. Go for an off-the-shoulder bodycon that emphasise your curves and match with statement jewellery and killer heels to lengthen your legs.


It's 5 o’clock somewhere! Daytime-cocktails

Drinking during the day is totally fine for a hen do, but failing to dress for the occasion isn’t!
No doubt there’ll be a big event on the night too, so your outfit needs to carry you from your daytime cocktails session to the evening. Think skinny leather jeans with mid-heel boots and a shimmery, metallic-embellished cami with a subtle diamante head chain, or pull on a high-waisted print skirt and match with a crop top or bodysuit and strappy heels.

Alternatively, wear an outfit that can transform! Pull on a glamourous, bare-shoulder shift dress with cute pumps and a neutral kimono for cocktails, then simply switch to stilettos, throw on statement jewellery and roll-up your kimono so it fits in your envelope bag for the night! 


Everyone needs some me-tome: spa days

Comfy but stylish is needed for a spa day, because there’ll be selfies along with the pampering! When you pop out of the jacuzzi, you want to dry off quickly — so a bathrobe is essential. Why not order all the girls matching robes with ‘bride’ and ‘hen’ on the back — perfect for that Instagram post by the pool!

Of course, swimwear is a must. A full swimsuit is usually more acceptable in a spa rather than a bikini you’d wear to the beach — but put on what you feel most comfortable in. If you’re going to be lying by the pool all day, you want something that you feel comfy both in and out of the water. Don’t hesitate in wearing a swimsuit with a pop of colour or embellishment, like frills. You’re at a party after all! And make sure you pack your fluffy sliders and flip-flops for the perfect base to any spa pool outfit.

Keep in mind you'll need to plan for any lunch outings and drinks too. Luxury spas sometimes have a certain dress code you should bear in mind — so keep it classy and understated. Peplum tops and skinny-sit trousers look gorgeous for lunch dates and evening get-togethers or why not opt for a stripe, culotte jumpsuit with a belt and pair of suede, ankle-wrap sandals? Finish with a tote bag or quilted clutch and be prepared for all eventualities at your hen spa weekend.

Keeping it cosy: girly nights in

Girly nights in are arguably even better than big nights out. If you’re celebrating your hen do indoors with your best friends, then make sure comfort is your priority.

Athleisure is a hot trend this year, and perfect for a girls’ night. Pair a pair of skinny joggers with a casual crop top and over-sized jacket or go for leggings and high-top trainers with a slouch sweater and headscarf for a contemporary, urban look. 

Alternatively, opt for a skort or shorts with a bold coloured tee shirt for a trendy, yet comfy outfit. And if you’re wondering about footwear, we say go for sandals, flats or espadrilles.

Hen dos are all about the bride-to-be, so don’t stress too much about your outfit; focus on the fun! Keep these hen do style tips in mind and make sure you pack the right outfits ahead of your next hen experience!


2 August 2018

Exorcising The Ghosts Of Relationships Past

* Long read - you were warned!

Hello there!  It has been sooooooo long since I have written a personal post.  So long since the words have floated around in my head until I had no choice but to filter them down through my fingers on to the page.

As ever, I can articulate so much better when the words flow through my fingers as I type; but tonight is the first time in a long time that the words have danced, demanding to be set free.

So what am I talking about tonight?  The ghosts of past relationships as a fat, insecure woman.

Looking back at past experiences with men in my life is hard for me to remember.  The experience that I have had with relationships is little, the heartache, a lot.  I have been hidden, I have been put up with; I have been the dirty secret and the one that was so nearly "the one", had it not been for my body.

What I have come to realise over the past few months is that although I have been treated badly in the past, I have allowed this to happen to me.  When society and your peers tells you that as a fat woman, you are not good enough, eventually you believe it yourself. So you overcompensate.

When the #MeToo movement was starting to take shape, I shared some of my own experiences of what happened to me in the past.  I was a fat teenager, but I knew that the actions of those that touched and grabbed at me were wrong.  I knew that the words said to me were unacceptable.

I railed against them, but my words were ignored; my experiences were explained away,  when telling others as "wear a baggier school shirt" (I never wore a tight shirt by the by).  "You have large breasts, what can you expect" (erm basic respect?).  A look up and down at my body and a "you should be grateful for the attention" (fuck you).  A  particular teacher comes to mind.

Those last words shaped me and the experiences that I have had with men for a long time.  Not just from them, but people close to me.  That same message. Be grateful.   Take what you can get because you are fat.

So I allowed transgressions to happen to me because, maybe, I should be grateful.  I allowed myself to be hidden because who wants to have a fat girl as a girlfriend, right? Be happy that he likes you in private.

My love life up until this point has been a car crash, with me shaving off pieces of myself and handing them over on a plate trying to find that love, that attraction; so that someone, sometime will think that I am good enough for them.  That I deserve more than to be hidden or been embarrassed by.

The problem with shaving pieces off yourself is that eventually, you start to forget who you really are. When you give so much of yourself away each time with no return, you lose a piece of yourself.

Society and other elements made me feel like I was not good enough.  It is only now that I look back and realise that, as Eleanor Roosevelt so eloquently put:

No one can make you feel inferior, without your consent

I have always avoided men that found the larger woman attractive.  I did not understand how they could think of me as more than a fetish.  I had no clue or realisation that someone could actually find me attractive, sexy.

As I type right now, I am dating someone.  We met through Tinder, on my first couple of days when I thought that I would give it a whirl.  We have been dating a few months now.  I will call him A.

With A for the first couple of months I found myself in the same familiar cycle.  The insecurities.  The wondering if he really did find me attractive.  The fear when he said that he liked larger women.  Was I just a fetish?

When you have spent the whole of your adult life with your body as the compromise, it is hard to believe that someone can be turned on by your body.
The thing is, he makes me feel sexy.  I no longer feel like that I need to give so much of myself to overcompensate for my body.  He is attracted to my body and, for the first time in my life; I believe it.

So as these new experiences wash over me, I realise that I am in no rush.  I don't feel the need to be his girlfriend.  I don't have the craving for commitment and am in no rush.  We may progress, we may not.  But I am enjoying dating someone and just, for once, having fun.  The pressure to hand myself, my heart over on a plate is no longer there.

I have no idea what will happen with myself and A.  We may date for a while and it may fizzle out.  It  may progress.  Who knows?  But what I do know is that I can be myself.  I can be goofy.  I can be silly.  Turns out, I am a bit of a tease too, which amuses me endlessly.  I can feel attractive and know that he is attracted to me.  I don't hold back on what I think or who I am.  I may even let him read something that I have written, maybe.

I feel good enough for someone now.  It is a lesson that I had to learn for myself.  If nothing else happens between A and I, that feeling will stay with me.   This thing we have is 50/50.  We are figuring each other out, having fun, enjoying each other without pressure.  I no longer feel, as I have done every other time, like I am on an audition.

We are on a dance and who knows whether it will end or whether we will continue to dance.  All I know is that the pieces of myself that I gave away are coming back to me and it feels amazing.  The parts of me I gave away, I am taking them back.  I have owned who I am for years now.  Now I own what I look like, imperfections, perceived or otherwise; and all.

He has given me the confidence in my body it is true and that won't go whatever happens, but my self worth, I finally took that back for myself.

The dating experience I am having now, I should have had so long ago.  It is only now that I realise that this is what I always deserved.  What has happened before I let happen.   That is on me.  What happens now?  Who knows.  But I sure am enjoying the experience.